Tag Archives: blessed

Holy Bad Day

anger-inside-out

Today, has been a hard day.

Think, “if I wasn’t in a public place right now someone would be really hurt” kind of a day. Fo realz.

Half serious.

Thank goodness I was in public.

It has been some time since I have had one of these. My blood pressure is still boiling. I can understand how some Mom’s turn into secret alcoholics. I am not saying that I would, but it is days like today that I can understand how some women get there. Phew.

Three is one of my favorite ages, but also at the same time one of the HARDEST ages. In my opinion.  How is it possible that someone can be SO, so sweet and loving and funny and then the next minute turn into [Linda Blair and Hulk had a baby]?!

It’s nap time now. Part of me wants to fall asleep to rejuvenate for the second half of the day, part of me wants to stay awake and do ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING so that I can have real quiet time and a small (small) part of me wants to do some chores so that it looks like I was productive today when important people come home. Hopefully they come home by themselves because if they bring a friend I will have to have done more chores. Decisions, decisions. ZZZZZZZZZZ…….

Thanks for letting me vent.

And, a word of truth to all of those sharing in my bad day…

1 Thessalonians 5:18: “ give thanks in all circumstances…”

All circumstances? Really? Ok. Well, thank you Lord that I did not kill my Son in anger. Thank you that I have a son and that I am blessed enough to have a bad day because of my blessed children. Thank you that this situation has caused me to come to you when I may not have if I was having an easy day. Thank you for nap time. Thank you promising to carry me through bad days (psalm 50:15, 1peter5:7, nahum1:7…). It would have been better for me if I wasn’t having a bad day, if I am being honest, but for some reason you want to teach me something through this, so… forgive me for my anger, forgive me for being tempted to turn to a glass of wine for comfort (and chocolate), forgive me for not being more patient with my children, help me to have patience, to have wisdom and, well, help me to be overflowing with every single fruit of the spirit. Amen.

Cheers!

=)

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Abram: One Month

I know I am going a little out-of-order since I still haven’t written about my birth story but I wanted to get this in before I forget. And, I only have a few minutes to write, the other story will take me a lot longer to write. It’s a good one! lol

So, my baby is one month old. Can ya believe it? I certainly can not!!

I call this picture:Sacrifice. Sacrifice is sharing your blanky with your little brother.

11 lbs 15 oz. Chunker!

He is smiling, coo-ing and I swear he has rolled over three times. I think he is too young for this to be intentional but I saw it happen.

Abram is an amazing baby. Definitely easier than Lucy but that could be because I have a better idea as to what to do with a baby this time. He is very laid back. He eats very well and sleeps great. I am spoiled and so blessed  (I am very sorry to all of the Moms who have babies that do neither of these things well. I wouldn’t have made this information public but this is sort of my Baby Book so I kind of had too. Please forgive me if this makes you upset -eek! Call My Mother-in-law, she can help you! Ha).

Abram has really cute dimples just like his Daddy. He has Lucy’s eyes. Definitely Ryan’s temperament. Maybe he has my knees? I’m not sure yet. Ha-Ha. It’s okay, I am glad he is all Price, he is a boy and that is how it should be. Plus, I think his Dad is a stud sp hopefully he will be too.

He has had a bad case of baby acne but that is clearing up. I guess that means it isn’t currently bad, but it was.

The hardest thing about having a boy? The diaper situation. That kid has things squirting out everywhere. I did not think such things were possible, but oh they are!!! Thank goodness we have hardwood floors. That is all I have to say about that!!

He does not spit up. I didn’t think babies didn’t spit up but apparently they don’t. With Lucy I was washing burp cloths every other day and I have a massive amount of burp cloths. I assumed that was how all babies were. I use burp cloths now to cover up his p****, not for spit up. {wink}

I still think nursing is one of the most painful things ever. It only took three weeks for me to heal and not have any pain. Why do I do this?!

When Abe was first born I am pretty sure that he has/had a sensitivity to dairy which meant I had to cut dairy out of my diet. Waaaah! I am grateful for that now because I couldn’t eat Ice Cream and I learned to use other foods besides cheese to flavor things. The DR says he is normal now so I can start eating dairy again but I am going to do it slowly and really try not to eat as much of it. I actually have come to enjoy it somewhat but it really does limit my choices which has been very annoying.

Back to my pre-baby weight but my body is not in pre-baby shape. I need to jump back on the workout wagon. Was I ever on a workout wagon? Ah, well, I guess I should just start working out. Or, something.

Lucy l.o.v.e.s. her brother!! Oh my goodness. She can not hug and kiss him enough. She does try to hold him and pick him up which is kind of scary so I have to be careful. I thought I was doing a good job yesterday when I put hin in the crib when I left the room for a minute only to return to find Lucy also in his crib. Oy. She is very helpful and does not seem the least bit jealous. Praise God! I did not know how this was going to go over…

I love him so much. Of course I think he is the cutest thing ever. It is amazing how one can love someone so much. I never thought I could love anyone as much as I love Lucy but I do. What a blessing he has already been to our lives, just in one short little month. Being a family of four is so much fun.

Don’t w0rry, all of this has come with difficulties as well. It has not been all rainbows and sunshine. My lack of sleep has caused me to become way more irritable with Lucy so I am constantly praying for patience. It is not that she is “bad” she just likes to get into things and she is really independent which gets me really annoyed sometimes and instead of being merciful and patient, I get easily frustrated. It makes me sad because she is so sweet and I don’t want to be a “mean Mommy”, I want to train her lovingly and again, patiently. I want to help her and teach her, not snap at her and make her feel like she is inconveniencing me. It is also really hard when the baby has fussy time during bed time or dinner time. I feel like I am ignoring Lucy or brushing her off (I usually read her books before bed but often we have had to skip them because of the baby) when I have to attend to him and it makes me sad.

The other difficult thing is that right after the baby was born Ryan had a HUGE commercial job which caused him to work 15+ hour work days for three weeks straight. That was TERRIBLE! Thank God for people who came by to help out and for bringing us meals so I didn’t have to cook. Not only did I have a brand new baby, a crazy two-year old, I lost my husband. Kudos to all of you single Mom’s out there who have to do this by yourself everyday.

It would be nice to actually get dressed and go out on a date for a few hours. Ah. One day.

Thanks for visiting. Sorry I have been MIA. I will probably not be posting too frequently for a little while. You know, still trying to figure things out.

Goodnight. It is nap time. Hallelujah!

 

PS. Can you believe there were two Abram’s at the Doctors Office yesterday! What in the world?!

 

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Abram: 39 Weeks

I’m ready for you buddy, feel free to come at any time!!!

I have felt the BEST I have felt this entire pregnancy the past two weeks. I have not been sick from food or emotional or exhausted… I feel like a whole new person. Dare I say I am even sleeping somewhat comfortably!

I have everything done that I wanted to accomplish before he arrives, even little random things that aren’t necessary but I was able to use my new-found energy to do! Woop-Woop. Thank you everyone for your prayers, I really feel them. I can’t believe the difference in how I have been feeling.

I am still a little nervous that my attempted VBAC will not work but God has even given me peace about that. I wouldn’t say I am completely okay with it, but I haven’t been worrying about it. I have been trying to focus on my labor plan and how I would like to deal with labor pains to try and deliver naturally instead of thinking about the “what if’s”. I am also less naive and more in tune with my rights as a patient so hopefully things will turn out a lot different. Fingers crossed!

Ryan miraculously had some paid time off this week so we were hoping that Abe would make his grand entrance so we could utilize this unexpected blessing. Of course he didn’t/hasn’t but it has still been nice to have my handsome man home with us for two days. If I wasn’t so large and close to my due date we could have done something extra fun… a last hoorah if you will. It’s okay, a trip to Annie’s Playground and a spontaneous “ice cream for dinner night” was just as special.

Poor Lucy has been sick with a high fever the past 48 hours. The only good thing about your kids being sick is that they sleep in. I have had almost two extra hours of sleep every morning! Oh how great it is to sleep past 6:30!! Now, she did wake up 2 or 3 times in the middle of the night trying to climb into our bed while sweating perfusely or begged us for a bowl of soup and crackers at 2 AM… not so much fun but HEY, there is something about not seeing the clock again until 8:30 that is so sweet!! I hope she feels better today, I feel bad for her. =(

I still like chewing on sponges. I spoke with a friend of mine who is familiar with the eating disorder Pica (which is what my issue would be classified under) and she said that since I am aware of it, I don’t need to worry (meaning, if I ate sponges and swallowed them without realizing I was doing it). It is weird, but I’ll be okay. So, to all of you who are really worried about me… I’m NORMAL! Ha-Ha. Talking about them makes me want to go get one…

SO, within the next week or two (or three if he is stubborn like Ryan), we will be welcoming our beautiful baby boy. I don’t have to see him to know he is going to be beautiful, I just look at his sister and I have faith (no red hair please!!). Ahh, what a weird strange feeling. It is helpful that I kind of know what to expect but it is also going to be very different. We can’t wait. Lucy is getting more excited. I am getting more excited. Ryan, well, I am sure he will express his excitement when he gets here… you know him… so stoic (can I use that word in this context?).

Well… alright… I’m going to go now. This could be my last post as a mother of one. Weird. Maybe eventually you will get some posts on other things besides me being pregnant or having babies. Wouldn’t that be exciting?!

*Ryan is not the best photographer so excuse our low budget pictures, he’s all I have to work with (love ya babe). =0P

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Bamalama

I’m hormonal. I’m grumpy, irritable, emotional, judgemental, guilty, lonely, tired, stressed, anxious and blessed all at the same time. I just want to curl up on someone else’s bed and vent/cry over stupid things. I want to say “what is wrong with me?!!” but I know the answer, I’m 37 weeks pregnant and this is normal.

I don’t like it. I’m pretty sure I wasn’t this crazy with Lucy. Nope, don’t think so.

I just have so much I want to do to feel prepared for this baby when he makes his appearance but I don’t have the physical or emotional strength to do it myself. Ryan works a lot so he isn’t here that much to help and when he does come home the last thing he feels like doing is going shopping or hanging pictures. I wish I could hire a PA so I could just sit in my rocker and point fingers. Man that would be awesome.

Lucy has been on amazing behavior lately. Totally God’s grace. SHe has not been sleeping that great but she has been obedient and polite and happy… I am so grateful! I don’t think I could handle a crazy two year old being where I am emotionally… we would both be having tantrums on the living room floor. THank you Lord for this lovely break from toddler attitudes and defiance. Thank you.

Remember in my last post I had mentioned that I have been having some oral issues? Like, wanting to chew and eat strange things? Well, I did buy a sponge, washed it with Gain laundry detergent, dried it and chewed on it. It was not as satisfying as I thought it was going to be. I think I got a cheap sponge because it kept falling apart in my mouth so I decided to lick it instead of chew on it and that was much better. After I realized that I am a huge freak, I bought a new toothbrush with stronger bristles and that has really been helping my temptation to chew on weird textured things. I have been brushing my tongue a lot…

I had a dream that I was on Project Runway and I designed and made all of my own clothes and I did an awesome job.

Everyone, let’s join together and pray that I will have a successful VBAC. Thank you.

I want him to be here but I don’t want to deliver him.

For all my Christian Folk that reads this here blog… I need some female fellowship. Just throwing it out there. I’m in a rut. I can’t get out/over/through it and I just need to hang out with some joyful people. Ok, thanks.

Margaritas! I want one! Actually right now I want an iced coffee which is weird because I don’t like coffee… but I’ll still take the Margarita.

Our parents and my lovely Sister-In-Law TO BE threw us a little Baby “Sprinkle” last weekend. I was so surprised and humbled by the generosity of our loved ones. Thank you sooooo much for all you did for us. Our family is loved, Abram is loved.

Here is a little montage of pictures of all the crafty gifts we received… so, so, creative!! Love it!!!

And so, I will leave you with this final thought:

“I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind… Does [this] make me crazy? Does [this] make me crazy? Does [this] make me crazy? Possibly!!”       -Gnarls Barkley

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27 Candles

I think this is the year that my hair will start turning gray.

I WILL be motivated to not just work off my baby weight but to get toned. Amen.

Stretch marks… doesn’t everyone have them at this age?

I WILL eat lots of Ice Cream because it is amazing.

Happy Birthday to me. What a wonderful year it has been!

A Hot Date, my favorite cake and some new shades- what more could a girl ask for?!

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The Little Things

It is the little things that Ryan does that really displays his love for me. Sure, it is nice to hear the words “I love you” every now and then but when he does something that I know he is only doing because it will help me or because I like it, that is when I really know he loves me. It is those little selfless acts of kindness and compassion that make me feel like the luckiest person in the world.

Cheese ball, I know.

After preparing dinner, cooking for an hour and finally sitting down to relax and enjoy it (the best you can while serving a husband and a child), it certainly is nice when Ryan says that he will clean up dinner. I’m sure he wants to do it just as much as I but he does it anyway because he wants to serve me and that speaks miles.

You guys know how much I loathe doing the dishes so really anytime I hear Ryan in there putting them away or washing them I love him a little more.

Last night I heard Lucy on the intercom and without thought or discussion, Ryan jumped right up to go check on her (when Ryan has to work all day I kind of feel like it should be my duty for midnight calls because he wakes up so early and my schedule is a little more flexible). When he got out of bed I remember thinking “wow- that was really nice!”. That doesn’t happen all of the time, most of the time it is I that has to run to her rescue but when he does do it, it really blesses me.

On Saturday Ryan dug up all of our landscaping, re-trimmed the gardens, planted all new garden things (you know, like plants and flowers) and has been non stop watering them (I didn’t know you had to water things so much- no wonder everything I plant dies). I’m sure the condition of the exterior of our home matters a little bit to him but really he did it all for me. Hours of intensive work because I wanted a nice garden (what man honestly really cares about color coordinated flowers?).  All of his hard work brought me so much joy. I really love it. He did a great job.

There are plenty of other things that he does for me on a daily basis that just says “I love you” without actually saying it (like calling me everyday at lunch time, hanging up his towel after the shower, taking out the trash, making extra eggs for Lucy in the morning and putting them in the fridge for when she wakes up…). When I stop and think about them, instead of all of the things he is NOT doing, it makes life a little sweeter.

I am feeling so blessed  by him this morning. Thank you Lord for such an amazing husband (flaws and all…).

* This post is not intended to make you jealous of my life or discontent in yours (trust me, my life and marriage are NOT perfect). I’m sure some of you are thinking “my Husband, Fiance, Boyfriend doesn’t do that”. I bet if you really think about it, there are things that you don’t even notice. You should go tell him/her right now how much you appreciate those things. I better go do that too before he leaves us for work.

Good-bye!

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if i died tomorrow…

 If I died tomorrow I would have a very long list of “things I want to do before I die”.

I  have a completely irrational fear of death. I guess it isn’t really irrational because it really could happen at any second, but I actually think I am going to die at any second. Is that weird? I have a huge fear of death. I know I should not be afraid because Heaven is a FAR GREATER place then earth, but obviously, I fear and am deeply saddened by the things I will miss out on if I die. Mostly milestones and events related to Lucy. I can’t imagine not being here for them. I know that if I am dead I will not know the difference, but I allow that thought to make me anxious far too often.

And a word to anyone that might like to take my place as Ryan’s wife after I die, I already promised him that I would haunt him and whoever he takes as his wife. Just so you know…

Now as many of you do probably have some mental note of things you would like to do or accomplish before your death… I have a nice list. And, for someone who is probably going to die soon (from natural causes I hope), I have not checked very many things off that list.

So, Lord, if you would like to keep me around a little longer so that I can accomplish at least half of these items, that would be great!

  •  Go to Paris. I would be nice if I didn’t have to fly. I don’t like flying.
  • Own my own restaurant or create the menu for an existing restaurant.
  • See Lucy and any other children we have get married.
  • Go to New York and be on the Today Show.
  • See my sister graduate college, be successful and live on her own.
  • Own a home on at least three acres of land with a big country porch, a mud room from a Pottery Barn catalog & a Theater Style basement.
  • Teach High School History.
  • Kiss Ryan Price before graduating High School.
  • Get married.
  • Have four children.
  • Be an outcast on American Idol.
  • Buy an outfit from White House Black Market and have somewhere to wear it.
  • Learn how to sew.
  • Go to Disney World.
  • Do a standing back tuck without a spotter.  (I almost accomplished this at one time… I think that ship has sailed.)
  •  Help my Mom start a Bakery.
  • Take Ryan to Vegas and Sponsor him in a poker tournament.
  • Dye my hair and then be able to dye it back to my natural color.
  • Plan someones wedding.
  • Help one person every single day.

 

On a side note. Though I do have a serious fear and concern that I am going to die before I “live”, I have already been blessed in my life. If I do not wake up tomorrow, I know that everyone I know and love will be taken care of. It does no good to worry about tomorrow. Live today as if it is your last.

Naturally I hope that I am missed but I hope that people would see my life as an example of God’s love and kindness. I hope that my life; my past, my present, my struggles and my blessings would be used to help others.

And, pease make sure Ryan doesn’t dress Lucy like a dweeb!

 

 

 

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