Before I start this post, I would just like to express how evident the grace of God was yesterday in my life. When it is nap time or “quiet time”, I really cherish the “free time” that I have those two hours. If anything, I mean anything, gets in the way of the only downtime I have in a 24 hours span of time, I get really pissed off. I know, it is a problem. However, yesterday, when something this “traumatic” happened, my natural self would have flipped out (meaning lots of yelling and stomping around) but instead, I was surprisingly calm. i could feel the frustration welling up inside of me, but it never actually exploded out. I call this a win. I’m never really happy when I freak out. I know that my number one job is caring for my children, not whatever *important* thing I am doing during nap time. BUT, man, oh man, sometimes a girl just needs a break! Thank you Lord for helping me through this one!
As I am sitting in the basement folding laundry and watching the latest episode of Revenge (what?! how did she…), I head some bumping around upstairs. This should have been a red flag but, I, believing that my child is an angel and can do nothing wrong when I threaten her not to get out of bed, assumed she was just throwing the books she reads in bed onto the floor.
Moments later, the dog that was sitting next to me jumped up and ran over towards the steps. I glance and notice Lucy standing there. I give a disapproving look. You know, the “Why are you out of bed” look. I look again.
What the… “LUCY! What did you do?!”
I get up and make my way towards my daughter, who, now looks like a smurf. “Lucy, what did you do?!”
“I tried to wash it off Mom!”
I leaned down to smell her. Right away I could smell that is was permanent. I picked her up and started up the steps.
“Where did you get this?! What were you doing?! Lucy! Where are you allowed to use markers?!”
“… on paper…”
“Are you paper Lucy?”
“I’m sorry Lucy, but this is very bad. This is bad. You are in big trouble.”
“I’m sorry Mommy!”
“Sit on this bed and don’t move (finger pointing). I have to take your picture so I can show your Father. He is going to be very upset with you.”
I didn’t know how else to take her picture without glorifying the action.
So… there was more discussion on the topic. I took her upstairs and told her that she had to go to bed now. She cried because she wasn’t tired. I told her she should be crying because her face will be purple forever. I knew that it was going to be difficult to get the marker off of her so in my mind, she could just go to sleep and I would deal with it later. Then I realized that she also colored all over the bottom of her feet so the marker was getting all over her bed rails.
“UGGGHHHHHGGGRRRRR! Ugh. Get naked right now! We have to take a bath!”
How can one be so sweet and happy. Stop being happy. You’re in trouble. Be sad.
I make the bath super warms and put a ton of soapy in the water. She jumps right in.
“Lucy. Stop playing. You’re in trouble.”
What is wrong with you? I’m so frustrated. Can’t you see that. I’m mad at you. Why aren’t upset that I am mad?
So I scrub, and scrub, and scrub. Oh, you colored your teeth too. Awesome! Here, brush your teeth.
“Mom, it’s not coming off!”
“Uh, I know! That is what I have been trying to tell you. This will never come off. You are going to be purple forever. That is why we do not color on anything besides paper.”
“Okay Mommy, I won’t do it again.”
“Good, now get out.”
“But Mom, I don’t want to get out of the bath yet, I’m not done playing!”
“Uh! It’s not play time! It is NAP TIME! You are supposed to be napping, not playing. Get out and get in bed!” I look at the clock. “Nevermind. You can’t take a nap now because you’ll sleep too long. Just play with your toys and do NOT leave your room until I come get you.”
“Okay Mom. Don’t forget your hug!”
“What? You want a hug?” Seriously. The last thing I want to do is give you a hug. Why do you want a hug. I don’t want a hug. “Why do you want a hug?”
“Because I love you Mom.”
Who is this child? Talk about a humbling experience.
“And a kiss Mom. I love you. Be happy.”
I mean really. Who can be mad at that?!
And then I go downstairs to finish the laundry and my show. And the baby wakes up. And the dog pees on the floor. And Lucy comes downstairs.
And, then, I found the masterpiece on my bedroom wall. And mirror. And the sink is stained purple, and the toiled is stained with purple foot prints. And there are little wads of wet purple toilet paper all around the sink.
*I still love her. It was kind of funny.